And, whoever is the strongest or the best manipulator wins and the other person loses the right to stand up for themselves.Īs a rule of thumb, parents tend to believe that children do not have any rights and they have to do what the parents say. But, when you stand up for yourself and impose on others, that means you take away their right to stand up for themselves. You truly stand up for yourself and you have made your statement that we just discussed, you allow other people to make their own choices and stand up for themselves.
Somehow there is this understanding that to stand up for myself means somebody else has to do what I want, or not I have to fight with them and whoever loses, or wins, either stood up for themselves or lost. They do all these things to get somebody to do something so they can feel better about themselves. Someone who imposes that on others, tries to manipulate them, tries to get them do things they want, they talk them into it, debate them into it, and force them into it. They are all subtleties but standing up for yourself is merely stating who you are, your preference and not imposing on anyone. What was your agreement with the partner? Is your agreement that you will do the work while they are away doing other the things? Well then you have to honor the agreement, not do what you want to do because you don’t feel it’s fair at the moment you are in your shit. What if they can’t? How will you get paid? That doesn’t make any sense. So, I may not like going to work, so I’m going to say “I’m not going to work today, so let somebody else do my job.” Well, how are you going to get paid? If you have a partner and the partner is busy doing other things and you feel they should be doing more work, you may call in sick so they have to do it. Then you have to judge in this lifetime is it reasonable, rational and logical. So somebody is doing something that you feel is unfair and you try to manipulate them into doing what you want so you feel it’s fair. Forcing someone else to agree with you, forcing someone else to do what you prefer them to do, forcing someone else to do anything other than being themselves is not standing up for yourself. This is my choice.” That’s standing up for yourself. “This is who I am and this is what I prefer. Standing up for yourself is traditionally seen as being a bit more aggressive.
“ “I am a person who doesn’t like to be licked.” “I am a person who doesn’t like to be spit on.” “I am a person who likes to stand in the sunshine, that’s who I am, I am stating who I am.” Stating who you are and what you prefer, that is standing up for yourself. Standing up for yourself is simply stating who you are. Aug/ michael / Change Your Life / No Comment
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